Friday, September 09, 2011

The Ladies Of Autumn Code Of Honour

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Our Code Of Honour

The purpose of The Ladies Of Autumn Code Of Honour is to define what constitutes acceptable and honourable behaviour within our glorious feline alliance. All members are subjected to extensive background checks before admission into the group. However, despite the immeasurable integrity of all our ladies, it is helpful to be absolutely transparent about the exacting standards and high level of moral decorum expected of each and every Lady of Autumn.

The core values underlying and reflected in the Code of Honour are:

Autumnal Colouring
All members of the alliance must possess a particular coat colouring as a minimum requirement for membership. Only tortoiseshell; tortoiseshell and white/calico; and torbie felines are permitted to apply for membership of The Ladies Of Autumn. Cats with modified fur colouring will not be accepted, this includes: dirty cats (brown colouring due to filth is not autumnal just an example of poor preening); and cats who have undergone cosmetic fur enhancement surgery and techniques.

Honesty
It is essential as a Lady Of Autumn to uphold the highest principles of honesty and integrity. We are subject to international public scrutiny and must provide positive role models for kittens all over the globe.

Respect
The Ladies Of Autumn are a privileged group in terms of their beauty, intelligence and independence. We must appreciate that there are many cats who are not as fortunate. The Ladies Of Autumn do not discriminate against any cats on the basis of their fur colouring; gender; hunting instincts; number of teeth; ability to manipulate their humans; or intelligence quotient. We embrace our fellow felines and actively challenge all forms of discrimination.

Feline Rights and Charity Work
Even in these modern times, feline oppression and abuse still exist. The Ladies Of Autumn have a powerful, independent female voice and this may be required to assist cats in need. For example, there was a horrifying story in the press recently about a cat who was being denied timely, nutritious meals. This poor creature was sometimes having to wait, staring at the humans, for five or ten minutes before being presented with his meal. When the meals did arrive, they often consisted of supermarket sachets of meat or fish rather than the fresh chicken fillets or sushi he required. The Ladies Of Autumn were quick to react; with their immense combined social and political weight, the humans of this tortured cat were reprimanded and have since undergone behaviour modification.

By joining The Ladies Of Autumn, you pledge to uphold the highest principles of honesty and abide by the core values of the Code Of Honour. You have a duty to report yourself and others for any infraction of the Code. Those who violate the Code of Honour shall can be subject to various sanctions, including deprivation of liberties (for example, a curfew on outdoor territory patrolling); denial of privileges (for example, withdrawal of access to snacks, such as Whiskas Chicken & Cheese Temptations); a range of fines; and imprisonment. If you are privy to an infringement of the Code and fail to report within a reasonable length of time, you will receive a punishment synonymous with those responsible for committing the offence.

4 comments:

P. Treasure said...

Sounds appropriate and reasonable. Good job!

Guy said...

*whispers and nudges person sat next to him* I think that last comment was made by Her Royal Highness Princess Treasure.

Admiral Hestorb said...

*agrees with Guy*

MoMo said...

I will have the last section printed in LARGE print and hang it on my SS's wall.